Zoe Sugg has gone from teen YouTube icon to full grown woman with new agendas and audiences. But having an online presence comes with a cost; the online backlash she has faced at times has been brutal. However, it has also helped highlight issues that need to be spoken about more often.
So today I went online to see the heartwarming news that influencers Zoe Sugg and Alfie Deyes are expecting their first child. As someone who grew up their original YouTube content, going to VidCon, exploring Brighton and doing fun collabs with friends like Casper Lee, FunforLouis and Tyler Oakley (to name a few) this really brightened up my day. However, it also brought up a lot of feelings, which I feel like sharing.
Firstly, it reminded me of when Zoe faced backlash for reviewing sex toys on the website she founded, Zoella. This resulted in her being removed as part of the GCSE Media Studies syllabus. Now, I have many, MANY thoughts on this. I personally studied Zoella as part of my Media Studies A Level, so aged 16 to 18. I quite enjoyed it, bagged myself a B, moved on. However, it has come to light that at no point was Zoe made aware that her brand (Zoella is a brand, Zoe Sugg is a person, clear that shit right up) was being used as teaching material, and she never gave consent for that. Not only that, but the fact that her TEAM (not just her personally) reviewed and published an article reviewing gadgets used for female masturbation was seen as SO COMPLETELY HORRIFIC AND DISGUSTING that the media and the internet raised hell. The age demographic for Zoella is 25-30 year olds, as the age the content is aimed at has grown up with Zoe herself, now aged 30. That is a perfectly acceptable age to be talking and reading about these kind of topics.
More importantly, most of the anger we saw on the media came from older people (lets be honest, older men) kicking off that female masturbation shouldn't be spoken about. At all. NEWSFLASH. Teen girls will and should explore their body, and be taught about it in a safe space so they can be comfortable and confident in themselves. This sadly is another show of the sexism in society and schools that still goes on today. This is why the Zoella article is so relevant and important, and should be spoken about more. Good on Zoe for standing by her work and refusing to remove it. It's so important that female role models with media platforms promote female sexuality and encourage empowerment, like Lily Allen and her campaign with WomanizerGlobal, and Zoe is another great advocate for such a cause.
( Peep the Zoella article below, because why not: )
Another thing that came out of Zoe's pregnancy announcement, which I kind of expected but hate all the same, was the amount of people who commented and shared saying "about time".
I cannot express how much I DESPISE seeing this phrase or similar ones when discussing female fertility. A women can choose to have or not to have a baby whenever she wants. Its a responsibility yes, its a big deal, a finance issue, needs mental preparation and stability yes yes yes. But if someone is ready to be a parent at aged 18 or 35, as long as they have love for that child and want to give them the best they can, then great. That's all that matters really (obviously having money and a support bubble is great too, but you can be a brilliant parent no matter the situation). Maybe Zoe decided to spend some time focusing on her career, maybe they needed more time to prepare, or maybe it was a happy accident, who are we to say or judge.
Also, the most important thing, and the thing that makes me the angriest, is how hurtful it can be. No one knows what's going on behind closed doors, and to say "about time" could be crushing to someone who may be struggling to conceive. 1 in 8 couples have trouble getting pregnant. One in 10 women have endometriosis, a super common issue for females that can seriously affect fertility. 1 in 8 pregnancies will end in miscarriage. And these things are not spoken about enough. I'm not saying this is something Zoe herself had to go through, but who knows? That's the point, you never ever fully know what someone else is going through unless they tell you directly. Chrissy Tiegen is one of many female celebs I love for her very public and open discussions about female fertility, as it is quite a taboo subject and it really shouldn't be. A lot of these issues I only found out as I got older through my own research. Things like Endo and miscarriage are so common, fertility issues are so common, and so hard to go through and talk about, yet they are rarely spoken about.
In conclusion, Zoe Sugg announcing her pregnancy really has reminded me how sexist society really is. Female pleasure, sexuality and fertility need to be spoken about, more often and more freely. And we need to stop judging women on pregnancy, and making insensitive comments. We need to throw out all the outdated societal norms, and start talking. Women are great, and guess what? We masturbate. We have periods, and fertility issues. We get pregnant or we don't. Sometimes it's easy, or an accident, and sometimes it never happens at all. And no matter what, women are killing it. They are amazing and loved and still a female no matter what. Your worth is not decided by "virginity", by pregnancy, by marriage or purity. And guys need to get invloved too. Quit the period jokes, the slut comments, get rid of that toxic masculinity and lets all just be friends and talk. And ladies, don't forget to love yourself, literally ;). It's normal and it's fun and if you want to then do it. Congrats to Zoe and any other expected mothers, you're doing great. If you're struggling with fertility, hang in there, and keep fighting, keep your head up. To girls passing that test, getting through another period, finding new love or leaving love behind, discovering yourself in new ways, I'm proud of you. And everyone else should be too.
All my love,
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